He Who Must Not Be Harryed
by Lily Flower and Magic Gal
Summary: CHAP 4 UP!!! Everythin is opposite! Tom Riddle- A boy who knew nothing, until Dafrid came along.
1. The Boy Who Almost Died

Disclaimer: We do not own anything you recognize, they are JK Rowling's.  
  
A/n: Hey! This is a SHARED account just so u know. Lily Flower is one of our pennames, and Magic Gal is another, hense the pen name. lol. Well the first chapter is written by both of us. So.... Here we go!  
  
He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Harryed!  
  
Chapter 1- The Boy Who Almost Died.  
  
One fine spring day a boy called Tom Riddle, aged five, sat in the park with his parents and best friend, Lucius. They were about to have the cheesecake dessert of their picnic, when the sky suddenly turned black.  
  
"MOMMY! What's going on? I'M BLIND! AHHH!" Tommy cried.  
  
"Oh my gosh it is He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Harryed! The feared and dreaded person that everyone hates!" with that, Mrs. Riddle fainted and fell on top of her son.  
  
"Oof!" Tommy struggled out from under his mother.  
  
"Hack hack, kaharf!!" He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Harryed cackled. "Ahem, sorry I don't laugh much.... Anyway, on with you! I'm about to kill you for absolutely no reason whatsoever! AVADA KADAVRA!!!"  
  
He had aimed at Tommy, but not a second to soon,  
  
"OO! A butty-fly!" and Tommy ran off to chase the butterfly, the spell missing him by inches, but leaving a heart shaped scar on his chin (A/N: We know, it's lame. But hey! It's supposed to be!).  
  
"Run while you can my son!" Mrs. Riddle called lamely after him.  
  
"Skipping to the fun part. AVADA KADAVRA!!!" Mr. Riddle fell to the ground lifelessly.  
  
"You have no RIGFHT to kill my husband, you jerk!"  
  
But she too had soon fallen to her death.  
  
Lucius started crying because he had seen to many dead people. He ran away after Tommy who was frolicking through the flowers.  
  
A/n: So what do u think? Review, we love reviews! 'Specially Lily Flower! Lol! I know it's short, but it's a start! Later days~ ~Lily Flower and Magic Gal 


	2. The Vanishing Mattress

Disclaimer: All J.K.'s  
  
A/n: Another shared chapter although this is Magic Gal typing  
  
Year One: The Warlocks Blanket  
  
Chapter Two: The Vanishing Mattress  
Tommy Riddle woke to the sound of light tapping on his door.  
"Now Tommy get up. You need to choose what you want to do on your special  
  
day." said his Uncle Tulio Furgslug.  
"Just a minute." said Tommy savoring what he remembered of his dream.  
He had dreamt that he had been on a flying ostrich with someone slightly  
  
familiar to him. He slowly got up and looked around his bedroom. He had  
  
the master bedroom and the largest bed in the house because of how much his  
  
aunt and uncle spoiled him.  
  
He got dressed and headed downstairs. Seeing all the presents on the table  
  
he immediately started counting them.  
"38 presents!! You shouldn't have," said Tommy, "When we go out today buy  
  
Smudly something. Getting all these gifts is making me feel bad for him."  
"Okay Lumpkin we will buy him two presents. Okay?" said Aunt Tulip.  
Tommy nodded his head.  
"What do you want to do today son?" Questioned Uncle Tulio.  
"I want to go to the zoo." replied Tommy.  
"Okay. We will go to the zoo." said Aunt Tulip.  
  
(A/n: I know its kind of lame but please stick with me.)  
  
As soon as everyone was done eating the family went on its way. When they  
  
got there they went from lions to elephants to bears until they got to the  
  
goats. Tommy was looking at one of the goats and started thinking 'I wish I  
  
could touch one' as soon as you could say 'bananas' there was a goat right  
  
next to Tommy (A/n: I keep on wanting to right Harry).  
"AHHHHHHH!!!" screamed Tommy as the goat started to head butt him, "Don't  
  
kill me kill him instead!" he yelled pointing to his uncle without thinking.  
His uncle started freaking out when he heard his nephew speaking in grunts  
  
and baas while pointing at him and then he saw the goat charging at him.  
"WHAT THE HECK DID YOU DO TO THAT DARN STUPID GOAT TO MAKE IT GO AFTER ME!!   
  
DON'T JUST STAND THERE YOU IDIOT---------(long line of swearing)!!!!"  
  
screamed Uncle Tulio at Tommy.  
When they all got home Tommy Riddle was locked into the smallest bedroom and  
  
stayed there watching some of his stuff gets moved in. Uncle Tulio and Aunt  
  
Tulip were moving into the master suite and poor Tommy was being moved into  
  
the smallest bedroom.  
That night Tommy was thinking about how furious he was with his aunt and  
  
uncle listening to them snore in Tommy's bed that he started to think 'What  
  
if the mattress all the sudden disappeared?' and again as soon as you could  
  
say 'bananas' there was a crash and a scream.  
Uncle Tulio, who was very grumpy from waking up to falling on the box  
  
springs, came storming in asking Tommy what the BEEP he had done to the  
  
mattress. Tommy acted completely innocent and near the middle of his  
  
uncle's speech he was thinking it might be funny if when he came back the  
  
mattress was there and of course that was what came to be.  
His aunt and uncle were furious with Tommy even though they couldn't prove  
  
that he had done anything but nothing made the Furgslugs madder than what  
  
happened next.........  
A/n: Did you like the end? Lily Flower and I love reviews...... 


	3. The Postcards From Someone

Disclaimer: We own nothin u recognize.  
  
A/n: Yo readers! Thanks for the reviews. Someone said the last chap wasn't  
  
as funny as the first one so watch out! We're gonna make it funnier... we  
  
hope. Lily FLower is mostly writing this with input from Magic Gal. R&R! ~LFAMG  
  
YEAR 1: The Warlocks Blanket  
  
Chapter 3: The Postcards to Someone  
  
Tommy Riddle woke up in his less than king size bed the next morning.  
  
"GET UP YOU LAZY BRAT!" screeched his uncle.  
  
"Ok!" said a bewildered Tommy. He stretched and dressed, hurried  
  
downstairs, and started to make breakfast, which used to be Smudley's job.  
  
"I'm starvin' Dad!" Smudley whined.  
  
"Maybe we could eat if SOMEONE would hurry up and make our freakin'  
  
breakfast!"  
  
"Done!" Tommy ran to the table, tripping on the cat and spilling scrambled  
  
eggs on top of it.  
  
"YOU FREAK! Clean it up- NOW!" Uncle Tulio said. "We'll have to have cereal  
  
instead. How about some Lumpy Bites?" Smudley responded with a 'mumble  
  
grumble' as his dad poored cereal into the bowls with the bunnies on them.  
  
When Tommy finally got to sit down to eat, Uncle Tulio snapped, "Get the  
  
mail!"  
  
Tommy obiediently obeyed. Not even looking through the bills, he put the  
  
mail on the table.  
  
"Bill, bill, letter for me, bill, bill-" he gasped. In Uncle Tulio's hand,  
  
was a postcard of an old man wearing a pointed hat, a cloak, and  
  
sunglasses, rubbing suntan lotion on his nose. The thing was- the picture  
  
was MOVING! Uncle Tulio flipped it over to see who it was for, and "where  
  
the BEEP" it came from. He read:  
  
Mr. T Riddle, The smallest bedroom,1234 Porkypot Drive, Little Whinging,  
  
Surrey.  
  
"Huh?" said his uncle. He read:  
  
Mr Riddle,  
  
We are pleased to inform you that you have been excepted at DogPimples school of Hitchcraft and Gizzardry. (A/n: hehehe)  
  
Term starts Sept. 1st and your train ticket is enclosed. Come, OR ELSE!  
  
Your supplies list is also enclosed. Thank you for your time, Minnie  
  
McGarviggle- Deputy Headmistress.  
  
Tommy read it over his shoulder.  
  
"Ahhhhhhhh!!!! I don't wanna go! We have to go away! A freak is chasing me! AHHHHHH! Pack your bags!" Tommy yelled.  
  
"Tulip, he's right! They could harm our family!!" Uncle Tulio said. Aunt Tlip nodded, and everyone packed as quickly as possible. After all, "a freak" was after Tommy.  
  
No more than 10 minutes later they were on the highway, (Smudley asked, "How'd we go so fast dad?" "Magic, of course!" said Tommy. "THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS MAGIC!")  
  
It had started raining and they couldn't see very well, for the fog. Suddenly, Aunt Tulip screamed, "STOP!" and Uncle Tulio slammed his foot on the brakes and they stopped a mere inch from what looked like a little boy, but when they looked closer, seeing that he had a mustasche and beard, they assumed he was just very short. Uncle Tulio got out of the car, and said, "What's wrong with you? Can't you see this is a highway?"  
  
"Well DUH! I come from Dogpimples School of Hitchcraft and Gizzardry." He spoke with a french accent, "I'm here to take young Tommy."  
A/N: So...? Whaddaya think? R&R! ~Lily Flower 


	4. Vertic Alley

A/N: Yo everyone! Srry we haven't written in a while. All Magic Gal's fault.  
  
Disclaimer: DON'T SUE US  
  
PPPPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEE!!! We own what ya  
  
don't recognize, but nuttin else!!  
  
Year One: The Warlocks Blankey  
  
Chapter 4: On The Way To Vertic Alley  
  
"What?" came a squeak from the backseat.  
  
Within a moment all of Toomy's things had been thrown out of the car and the Slugfurg's car was speeding away.  
  
All the sudden the Gloomius Dafrid person pulled out a quill and parchment and quickly wrote:  
  
Yo Piggisaur! I gotst Tommy. Goin' to Vertic Alley.  
  
Later Dude,  
  
Dafrid  
  
"WHAT THE HECK IS VERTIC ALLEY! WHAT KIND OF NAME IS PIGGISAUR! LET ME GO BACK TO MY FAMILY YOU IDIOT,CREEP,MORON,DOOFUS,RETARDED FREAK!" Tommy yelled very loudly.  
  
Dafrid swung Tommy over his shoulder and started to take out a wand.  
  
"WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING! PUT ME DOW..."  
  
The people who saw this very weird scene only saw them disapear...  
  
Tommy and the 'freak' carrying him ended up in a fasion store.  
  
A stick of a person walked up to them. "Dafrid we got the new boxers with sparkly hearts on them. Would you like a pair?" he said.  
  
Dafrids pale hairy face turned red as the hearts on the boxers. "Not  
  
today." he said nudging towards Tommy.  
  
"My lord. Tommy Riddle!" he said in reply  
  
"NO KIDDING! yelled someone in the store.  
  
All the sudden Tommy was rampaged by a herd of people trying to shake his hand or see his scar.  
  
Dafrid yelled with a voice so loud that it seemed not to have come from  
  
such a little body.  
  
"WE'RE GETTIN' YA OUTTA HERE TOMMY!" he yelled to him in the crowd.  
  
Tommy grabbed Dafrid's hand and Dafrid dragged him through a weird looking coat rack and where the two of them ended up was even weirder than the shopping store place...  
  
A/N: Sorry it's short^^. TO BE CONTINUED IN "WITHIN THE WALLS OF VERTIC ALLEY"... 


End file.
